Quiet Times for Moms of Littles
Editor’s Note:
This is the fifteenth in a collection of spiritual reflections on the famous passage on Love in 1 Corinthians 13, written and compiled at the end of 2019. Two of our sisters in Christ – Jan Mitchell and Mary Shapiro (see their bios at the end of this article)– lead a group of young mothers and wanted to create a quiet time series for them on the theme of Love. This series is the fruit of that effort.
1 Corinthians 13:8a – LOVE NEVER FAILS
Hello, my name is Beverly Kain and I am honored to share this lesson. First of all, let me say I am in NO WAY an expert on this subject, but it’s a privilege to share with you the things I’ve learned and am still learning. In talking about having a love that never fails, we have to remember that love is a very powerful thing. And of course, it’s powerful because God is love (1 John 4:8 & 16) and He is ALL powerful.
The thing is, we will NEVER love perfectly or know all there is to know about love, so we should be continually growing in our understanding of it and implementing of it, especially as parents. I have a 21 and 18-year-old, and I’m STILL learning to love them the way they need to be loved and in the ways that make THEM feel loved.
So, having a love that never fails comes from imitating God who definitely has and expresses love that never fails to us all the time. As parents, there are many ways to grow in learning to have a love that never fails for our children, but the one I want to focus on in this lesson is in having an unfailing love through ALL their emotions. As I said, my children are “grown” now but this is something I wish I knew and understood better when they were younger.
I know we often teach our children about having a happy heart and we should, but too often we act as if that’s the only acceptable emotion. We have to be careful not to make them think all other emotions are bad or wrong because they’re not. We have all the emotions we do because we were made in the image of God and He has all these emotions. We need to have a love that never fails by teaching our children how to accept and deal righteously with ALL emotions, including sadness, sorrow, anger, rejection, fear, anxiety, etc., and I’m sure there are many others. We need to help our children express their emotions, embrace them and use them appropriately rather than just trying to make them be happy all the time. God gave us these emotions and they serve a purpose. And, God as our Father doesn’t just call US to be happy all the time, this is unrealistic. A part of having a love that never fails for our children is to accept ALL their emotions and teaching them how to navigate them spiritually.
Sadness/Sorrow
Isaiah 53:3
Here it says that Jesus was a man of sorrows and familiar with suffering, because he was despised and rejected by men. We need to show our children that Jesus can relate to being sad and being rejected, but also that He didn’t just wallow in it. Instead, He continued to keep His eyes on God and obey Him so He could overcome these sorrows and rejections.
Matthew 26:36-39
Here again we see that Jesus can relate to sadness and sorrow, but He handled it by praying and depending on God.
Anger
Psalm 30:4-5
God gets angry but He doesn’t stay there long. We need to teach our children that anger is a natural emotion but it’s what we do with it that matters and they can’t just stay in it brooding.
James 1:19-22
God says we should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry and humbly listen to God’s Word planted in us.
Fear & Anxiety
Psalm 56:3-4
It says WHEN I am afraid - so it’s normal to feel afraid and it will happen. We need to make sure our children know that. The answer is to trust in God when we are afraid.
Isaiah 51:12-13
Help them know that God comforts them in their fears and help them remember how AEWSOME God is because He made the heavens and earth. And that same amazing and powerful God loves them and will be there to comfort them when they fear.
1 Peter 5:6-11
Anxiety is real and it’s normal because God addresses it. God says to cast it all on Him. We have to teach our children to accept their anxiety and then how to give it to God, because He cares for them. We have to teach them to be self-controlled and know that Satan is always trying to tempt them, but they are not alone. Others are going through the same things and God will restore them and make them strong.
There are many other emotions, but I hope this has at least got you thinking of ways to love your children with a love that never fails by accepting ALL their emotions and helping them learn to use them properly and have the freedom and space to voice them.
Jan Mitchell : Jan has been a disciple for over 40 years. She and her husband, Mitch, have been married for 43 years, been on staff at 6 different churches, have 2 children and 3 grandchildren. She is a die-hard Wolfpack fan, and enjoys spending time teaching and training, traveling and playing outside with their grandchildren. She currently lives in the greater Raleigh, NC area.
Dr. Mary Shapiro is currently the Director of the ADHD Clinic at Duke Medical School's Southern Regional Area Health Education Center in Fayetteville, North Carolina, where she specializes in the diagnosis and treatment of ADHD, behavior disorders, and other childhood conditions. For the 30 years prior to moving to North Carolina, she and her husband, Dr. Michael Shapiro, were in private practice in Athens, Georgia, where they served children and adults in predominately rural and underserved areas. She completed her PhD in Educational Psychology at the University of Georgia in 1984 and interned in the Department of Neurology at the Medical College of Georgia. She and her husband have lectured extensively (both domestically and abroad) on topics related to child psychology, parenting, marriage, adoption, and mental health issues in a Christian context. They have authored two publications for Discipleship Press International; “Rejoice Always: A Manual for Christians Facing Emotional Challenges” and “Understanding Sexual Behavior in Children: How to be Proactive in Educating and Protecting your Children.
2 Comments
Dec 29, 2021, 12:31:59 AM
Rolayo Ogbonnaya - Thank you for pointing out how our emotions ŕemind us that we are made in the image of God. I am grateful for these practical reminders for me personally and àlso for me as a parent with grown kids.
Dec 28, 2021, 1:05:47 AM
Barbara Thando Maphiri - Exactly what I needed to hear, thanks very much.