Loving People through Transitions: How to Navigate Ministry Changes with Compassion and Empathy

by Pam George

I have served in leadership roles for the past 30 years, and one of the hardest challenges I’ve faced as a leader is navigating transitions. Over the years I have been on both sides of shifts. 

As a leader, I have had to deliver the news of letting someone go and I’ve also been the recipient of such news. God convicted me of my ignorance and lack of empathy through experiences of transitions and research in the field. 

Specifically, I can recall a situation when my boss was asked to step down from her leadership role. It wasn’t long after, that she was plagued with depression, health challenges, and despair. She quit the organization. There was nothing said about the transition; just awkward avoidance. 

I decided to reach out to her. It shocked me to find this once confident, powerful woman sitting devastated in her living room after years of serving an organization. She had no emotional support or direction. Although she had received a financial severance, her psychological needs remained unmet. I have witnessed similar situations happening in the ministry. I’ve seen heroes I’ve admired for their faith leave our churches, disillusioned, disunified, and distressed.  

This article is a result of promptings of the Holy Spirit to help equip leaders to navigate transitions lovingly as Jesus would. My intent is to share insights I’ve gained in my personal growth and academic studies, and prayerfully provide some tools to equip leaders faced with these situations. I will share best practices from research in the field of organizational change and end with Jesus’ example in navigating transitions.

Influencing Factors 

For transitions to be successful, it is essential to take a look at factors that influence organizational change. Some leaders may be unaware of the underlying forces that cause resistance and disillusionment among their employees. DeNeal (2008) attributes it to a “force that functions at a subconscious level” (para. 3). Rousseau (1998) called this mysterious force a psychological contract. A psychological contract iceberg model (see Figure 1) involves implied relationship expectations, reciprocal beliefs, and a mutual unwritten understanding between the two parties (Accipio, 2019). The employee contributes inputs with the hope that the employer will reciprocate not only with pay, but rewards. 

Unspoken Expectations 

Theorist Robinson (1994) found that violations of psychological contracts or unspoken expectations can give the perception to the parties involved that the other had fallen short, even though these expectations were never voiced or written. Ultimately, the leaders’ ignorance of unseen forces can impact organizational citizenship and be a problem that hinders success. 

Even in the ministry, there are unspoken expectations as disciples commit their lives to service. Violations of unspoken expectations may affect trust and connection with the church body. For example, a recent survey of 12 ministry leaders revealed that they entered the ministry with expectations of clear communication, ongoing mentorship, security, patience, consideration, and inclusivity. They expected to be respected, given the benefit of the doubt and “a certain level of doing this together.” When they experienced changes in their roles, they expressed violations in some of the above expectations, which led to broken trust and emotional upheaval.

Lack of Communication

Another influencing factor leading to poor transitions is the lack of communication. A survey conducted by Barna in partnership with Brotherhood Mutual showed that 41% of those who experienced changes positively reported that contact was unambiguous (Barna Research, 2019). In contrast, 51% of the respondents reported negative feelings, as communication was not clear (Barna Research, 2019). When asked what would make transitions smoother, along with connection, unity was essential (Barna Research, 2019). These results reveal that transparent communication builds unity.

Additionally, Barna’s research mirrors the survey responses of the 12 ministry leaders who experienced transitions. A common theme was a lack of transparency in communication. They expressed that after the transition, roles were cloudy. The change was “surprising and abrupt,” guidance and direction were absent. Post-transition communication was lacking—many expected continued mentorship and support in transitioning to their new roles.

Emotional Upheaval

Fisher’s transition curve describes the emotional upheaval change causes (see Figure 2).

Leaders who manage change address the functional and strategic aspects of change.  However, researchers Ibarra & Scoular (2009) found that sometimes leaders lack the relational and soft skills required to ensure success.

The surveyed participants expressed grief caused by insensitivity, lack of warning, dialogue, failure to hear both sides, the involvement of a few decision-makers, lack of collective prayer, and fasting involving all parties. The survey also revealed that leaders implementing transitions acknowledge the grieving process, but don’t think it is their responsibility to provide emotional support.  David Kessler, a grief researcher, says that regardless of the event, it is important to avoid minimizing grief since the pain is the same irrespective of the source. The person grieving needs support to find meaning to move forward. 

Navigating the Change Process

Best practices to navigate change successfully, include providing emotional support and relational nutrients. Change experts recommend normalizing transformation through transparent communication.

Provide relational nutrients

Townsend, in his book, People Fuel, argues that people cannot turn off their feelings of loss. A leader who does not provide support for someone going through loss, even for a few minutes, is running the risk of engagement and turnover problems.

A person’s emotions, when compared to their rational brain, can feel like a mighty, uncontrollable elephant (see Figure 3). Even if the person riding the transition is spiritual and sound, the emotional upheaval caused by the change makes it challenging to move forward. However, a good leader has controlled the environment and can provide the support needed.

Townsend describes relationships as “nutrients” necessary during change and cites neuroscience and attachment research that states “health and growth” comes through communication, “acceptance” and “attunement.” He says even just speaking words like, “You are not alone in this transition,” produces endorphins which support them to move through the pain of change.

Normalize Change

Cloud in his book, Necessary Endings, recommends normalizing transition reduces the threat. Clear transparent communication minimizes threats and provides the flexibility and focus needed to implement transitions. Church transition experts, Ozier and Griffith (2016), recommend that best practices within the transition process should begin a minimum of 18 months. They recommend that the supervisor implementing the transition, and the person they are thinking of transitioning should be on the same page. 

Transparent Communication 

Getting everyone on the same page requires transparent communication skills. Most leadership transitions are often not planned until a crisis forces the change (Cloud 2010). Cloud says endings are necessary, but many do not know how to address them and tend to avoid them until it’s inevitable.

Transition experts have used the Kubler-Ross change curve to create a transition model where the y-axis represents the emotional state of those transitioning, and the x-axis depicts the time it takes to normalize change (Smith, 2017) (see Figure 4). The illustration shows that “well-managed change” can minimize threats and shorten the period of challenges encountered in the change process (Smith, 2017).

Implementing Successful Transitions

A Biblical Model

The process of transition is in the Bible, especially when Jesus was transitioning after his death. The disciples experienced despair, guilt, doubt, fear, threat, depression, and even suicide. But Jesus’s response shows us his priority in loving well. He met each of his disciples—who individually responded to transition very differently—in their emotional state and moved them forward. 

Townsend divides successful transitions into four different quadrants:

• Be present

• Convey the Good

• Call to Action

• Provide Reality 

Jesus modeled all of these relational nutrients for us. When you consider Jesus, he began to talk about his goals and what his followers were to expect very early in his ministry. Jesus communicated his plan of transition often and prepared his disciples for the pain they would experience. He then followed up with them after the event and helped them work through their emotional trauma. 

John 20 and 21 show examples of how Jesus loved his disciples through the transition of coping with his execution. Plans for their future and all they had sacrificed to follow a radical leader were changed forever. The apostles didn’t understand Jesus’ message fully, yet he still went ahead to help them navigate through the transition process (see Figure 5).

In John 20:15, Jesus responded to Mary by asking her a question, “Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?” and then called her by name, “Mary.” Jesus validated her emotions and then valued her as a person. 

John 20:19 describes the disciples locked in a room in fear. Jesus showed up and offered them peace and direction. 

John 20:24 shows Jesus following up with doubting Thomas, taking the time to clear his doubts. 

John 21 describes the disciples disillusioned and going back to fishing. Jesus again displayed empathy by meeting them where they were; even encouraging them with a boat full of fish after they had fished all night and cooking them breakfast! Here is Jesus, at such a crucial transitional time in his ministry, meeting the emotional needs of his disciples. 

Ephesians 2 teaches us to value people for who God created them to be, and leaders have to partner with God in equipping the saints for acts of service. Therefore, a leader who stays engaged relationally and emotionally with those going through transitions will be building up God’s church. 

After his disciples experienced the traumatic execution of their leader, Jesus re-appeared, consoled, and provided direction to help them move forward (John 20-21). What a powerful example! Once again, as believers we can see that Jesus provided a powerful example of leadership and how to help his ministry navigate successfully.

Conclusion

In conclusion, I pray that the insights gained through research in the best practices of navigating transitions would help to equip leaders in loving people through changes. I pray we will heed Jesus’ example in valuing people and grow in our empathy skills. Regardless of the circumstances, transparent communication and relational nutrients are vital ingredients to normalizing the psychological impact of change. When we honor psychological contracts by imitating Jesus, we build trust, value our fellow workers in the Lord, and partner with God to build His kingdom.

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